by gabriel.

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released August 22, 2016



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gabriel. New York

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Track Name: unconditional
There is something I have to say
To the ones who stuck by me all the way,
To the ones who knew walking through that door,
To the ones who bled their dreams on this floor.
You will always be my only friend
And I'll stand by you till the end
Because some things are worth dying for.

There is something I have to say
And I've decided today is the day.
I promise to never let this die
You and I side by side,
Until we sleep beneath the ground
I will never let you down
And I know that there may come a day
When we all grow up and move away
But tonight I'll see you at the show.
Or another time,
Another place,
Where the paths of life and death all go.

We'll sing the songs and find the light,
And everything will be alright.

Then I'll tell you.
there is something I have to say.
and I don't want it to fade away.
I can not let this go unheard!!
But before I say another word,

I can see it in your eyes!
-This is a dream that never dies-

It was always us from the start
and I love you with all my fucking heart
because of you it means so much more!

and it's something worth dying for.
Track Name: bedtime story
Once upon a time, I could echo.
"love is not allowed in me."
the beautiful words always raise the stakes to remember these things
but it is night and i am dreaming.
I am dreaming cannot hide.
I am dreaming this pain will never end.
I am dreaming you could be the same...
..that i could be the same.
Now listen to my story.

A night child grows restless in his secret garden, in his forgotten
still waiting to walk away...
with his blood raining back upon him.
Still with grass stained blue-jeans and dreams tainted with "forever".
A little boy that chokes on nightmares,
in a place where intention hangs in the leaves
and the night is calm enough to fall in love,
with the whispered words of broken hearts...
and as all the pain comes flooding back,
my memories finish what my razor starts.

This is a new holiday, with a new season.
This is a new explanation with a different reason.
It has no happy ending,
no beautiful fairy...
no path leading home...
no wish fulfilled.
And it's written with every word that you have ever ignored.
It's about falling asleep and feeling nothing,
and when it's almost over...
it's about dying alone.
Now remember. Just listen.

Scream my words as if you knew,
as if you could understand vacancy in the soul of a child.
...a candlelit picture of fading hearts,
and a memory to finish what your razor starts.
We'll drift off to sleep wondering why,
we fell from the sea to ponder the sky...
waiting to be forgotten in
the end.
Track Name: the best of wishes
I want to apologize to anyone who didn't survive tonight...

Perhaps you didn't know what you were getting into,
Maybe you didn't know what things like this could do...
This one Is for anyone that knows the truth.
This is not about the promises you made to me,
it's about the promises you have to make to yourself
For all the kids that die on "why?"
Fuck everyone that passed us by...
... so hard just trying not to cry,
Watching each other slowly die.

So Don't Forget the times we had,
Hold them close in bed tonight,
I don't why it has to hurt so bad,
I don't why they think their right...
Just remember why you sang this song,

We are the ones who don't belong.
But when some things break, they can never be fixed
and we will never be fixed.
i will never be fixed.

so If you still think wings will carry you...
Abandon all hope, if you enter here.
I always wished the same wish, just on different stars.
But it seems there was nothing left for me.
i guess i wasn't good enough.
so please remember me.
I would have suffered anything.
I'm sorry everyone, I tried my best...
Now only records and razors can say the rest.
Track Name: lust
let me be the one to say that it's alright to feel this way.
It isn't wrong to want the world,
never deny yourself from anything...
for anyone.
Ten years from yesterday,
with hopes and dreams dying in your hands...
I'll be there...
but i won't care.
So tell me now to hold my tongue,
just to play these little games and wrap my heart in chains.
The stupid role you put me in, the kind of world you see...
it doesn't mean a thing to me.
Tell me it's wrong,
Tell me you're right...
Tell me what you want to hear,
But who the fuck are you?
and you'll do it time and time again,
so don't you ever call yourself my friend.
Show me that you know it all,
you're so content to watch me fall.
Let me do what i may,
even if i throw it all away...
it's what makes me feel alive,
it replaces what you stole inside.

This is my life not your fucking lie.
Track Name: whispers and screams and the distance between
I close my eyes,
and behold the trumpets.
This fucking nightmare is the only thing i know.
As they try to light the candles,
ghosts of regret grasp my coffin handles.
The chilling wind tears the tendons of my soul,
the chilling wind tears the tendons of my heart.
This is how I sleep...
These demons nourish me.

The octaves climb, and my eyes close tighter.
The scent of blood, and my head gets lighter.
I slip away in the frigid autumn breeze.
The ground below sings distant melody.
This Is How I Sleep.

Darkness swallows me.
There was a time before my hopes all died,
before my days gave way to blackened skies.
But that's all gone and there's nothing left to hold.
The anger builds, the hatred forges steel.
This disease for me is far too real.
It's far too real...

A perfect song to describe catastrophes.
a fire dances on the eves of every tree.
This Is How I Dream
Nightmares Haunting Me.
Track Name: the necklace
there was just something in the air...
it tasted like the ocean breeze when i was young,
turbulent and elusive as it spilled across my lips
and now i'm standing on our shore.

seconds away, only seconds
till it rips through my throat.
seconds away, only seconds
till it happens again.

there was just something in the the air,
it smelled like autumn's star speckled hair
and i held that breath long in my lungs,
like first kisses when we were young...
and now seconds away till this song is sung.
seconds away, only seconds
till this one breath finds it's mark,
till green fields fade and bedrooms go dark...
and for a moment a smile flashes across my face
in the backseat we were dreaming of a better place.
for a moment i believe it will be okay,
and this one breath will bring back that day.

So now i'm standing on our shore
i can hear the songs that i adored
with this breath held tight beneath my chin
my eyes flutter closed upon the wind...

and then the breath is gone...
these are the words of my love song.
my parting words to the truest of friends,
the wish in my heart to make amends...
but was there anything i could have said
to cut the rope you tied around your head?
was there anything we could do?
a sunny afternoon to see us through?

Then the bullet rips through my face
searching to find our better place,
but as skull snowflakes descent the skies,
i saw only what was left in your eyes.

"distance will always be distance" are the words of the sea as it waved
to the sky.
Track Name: the widow
Last night I bled to death.
Searching for the peace of pain.
To find the words spun on this page.
I looked for light in every vein and here we go, here we go
Again. AGAIN.

A little calmer this time, a little less screaming
almost soothing. Falling into the open spaces and into the web
we all collide. WE ALL COLLIDE! Searching for the light inside
and into her web, we find the pain as we rip the words from every vein.

I spin my thread of heated ink and crimson fills the bathroom sink.
I inject the pen into my arm, INTO MY ARM!
Beneath my skin the web takes form. A little calmer , a little less screaming. Prepare for impact. Here we go.

Can't see the words, can't find my light. I've watched this pen carve day to night. And one by one we all collide. Blood and ink, love and fear. The words and songs they make the thread. The loyal pens they paint the web. We carved our hearts into her pages, and in return she guards our cages. We carved our hearts into her pages. CARVE OUT OUR HEARTS! Carve out my heart. Carve out my heart.

And then there's nowhere left for us to turn and our questions aren't concerned with answers. Bibles, poems , anthems, vows. We rise and fall into the web again until we find those open spaces, as the colors stolen from our faces. We search for light in every breath, until our blood is all that's left and now it empties on her page.

After searching every vein, blood stains on my pen remain.
Two more cuts, two more cuts and straight until morning.
Only the stains from our pen remain, only the stains from our pen..